Month: August 2024

encouragement, Uncategorized

Hurt vs. Offense: Understanding the Difference and Moving Forward

The Kedge Anchor

Photo by Ric Rodrigues on Pexels.com

As humans, we tend to get our feelings hurt. Sometimes we get offended. What’s the difference? Hurt is something we feel when when someone does something bad to us, i.e. talk smack or gossip harms us physically etc. Being offended is something we choose. For example, someone’s opinion, being offended is more of a reaction, that’s something we can control.

So often I hear of believers leaving churches and falling away from the faith because they have been hurt. I can totally understand. There have been times I have been hurt by churches. It happens for whatever reason. Long story short, my husband and I were snubbed by the lead pastor on on wedding day. He didn’t officiate weddings and the reason was because that would have been his weekend job, i get it. So we had the singles pastor (who was married, he was a great guy and I’m sure still is) perform the ceremony (side note he had been fired just before our wedding for ridiculous reasons $$$). Anyway there was also a mix up with the room we rented but it the pastor doing the ceremony straightened that out. Despite all that the day turned out great and been married 30 years : ) .

That wasn’t the only time, there have been other times in the past before that that churches got a little petty about things. I’m not going to go into detail, trust me it happens in churches and in other organizations. We are human. But I also want to be sensitive to the fact that there is some serious hurtful things that go on in some churches. Some things that hurtful physically and emotionally and should be dealt with.

Many people leave the church, not just the organization itself, they leave the faith. It’s really sad when they leave because they were offended. Even if you were harmed in some way doesn’t mean you leave the faith, your faith in God.

Look at it this way, you go to a restaurant and receive bad service. What do you do? You most likely don’t leave a tip and don’t go back. Done, easy. That doesn’t stop you from going to other restaurants or stop eating all together. You find other places to eat. The same with our faith and the church. My husband and I never went back to the church where got married but that didn’t change our faith in God. We eventually found another church. Hebrews 10:25 “And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” (NLT)

We could have gone to the lead pastor at the church where we were married and told him how his behavior made us feel. But they fired the pastor who married us for ridiculous reasons and felt leaving, forgiving and moving on was best. Wait, what, forgive? Yes. Matthew 18:21-22 “Then Peter came to him and asked, ‘Sir, how often should I forgive a brother who sins against me? Seven times?’ ” ” ‘No!’ ” Jesus replied, “ ‘seventy times seven’ !”

 Though we never went back, we forgave in our hearts. (It may sound like we haven’t in this post but we never disparaged the church, we think about it sometimes, wonder where they are and yes even prayed for them. One day we all will account for it all.

So this post is to encourage those who have left their church or their faith because of something the church did or said or because of something someone in the church did or said. You have two choices; one, confront the person or person(s) or two, find another church. It’s so easy to do these days with social media. But even with social media, finding a church is like looking at a menu online, if you think you may like a church go and check it out in person, just try it. If the first one you try isn’t the one, keep searching. Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Look for a church that is preaches God’s word, preaches the truth of God’s word. Many churches post this on their websites. It maybe under the “About’ tab or “Our Beliefs.” Ask friends or co-workers for recommendations, like you would for a restaurant and go.

If this has happened to you, share your experience in the comments. What was your journey finding the new church? What drew you or made you feel at home?

hope

Finding Forgiveness and Redemption Amidst the 33rd Olympic Games Controversy

The Kedge Anchor
Image by Sr. Maria-Magdalena R. SMCB from Pixabay

The events that have taken place here in America and in France have me pondering, what is happening? I’m trying to process and make sense of it all as I am sure everyone has. At first, I wasn’t going to post anything, but I kept having a nagging feeling. But, let me preface this post with, we all have our own perspectives, this is mine and it’s what God has placed on my heart.

The events that I am talking about are the attempted assassination on President Trump and the opening Olympic ceremonies. This may be part one of two because there is just too much to write in one blog post. Today I just want to cover the Olympics.

My husband and I watched the opening ceremony of the 33rd Olympic Games and we kept asking ourselves, “what are we watching?” I saw some of the beginning before I dozed off and woke up to my husband describing to me what he saw. He began scrolling through social media feeds to show me what I missed. I was even more confused and bewildered at what I was seeing. We all know what I am talking about, the spectacle of what looked a lot like the Last Supper.

People were defending France’s performance and that it was a representation of bacchanalia and it has nothing to do with the Last Supper and had no intention of representing it. Bacchanalian is defined as “(especially of a party) involving a lot of drinking of alcohol, uncontrolled behaviour, and possibly sexual activity:” “The Bacchanalia were unofficial, privately funded popular Roman festivals of Bacchus, based on various ecstatic elements of the Greek Dionysia.” France is known for its for being showy, flamboyant, and well let’s face it lack modesty. I am not defending what we all witnessed, just sayin’. I don’t know what France’s intention was, I am not a mind reader. I was and still am taken aback by what I saw.

Trying to process all that I, we witnessed, I wasn’t sure what I was feeling. I really had to process. What I was feeling was grief. I am saddened by what I saw. It broke my heart. Let’s remove the whole Last Supper reference, to me it was just bad taste. Kids were watching this. This is the Olympics, it suppose to be family and kid friendly. Never would I imagine that the opening ceremony would need to be censored. Add in the Last Supper and that just took it to another level.

Some may be arguing that perhaps many of us aren’t educated enough to understand Bacchanalian, or it’s just Greek mythology, this is just French culture, and some will argue that DaVinci got it wrong with Jesus and the disciples sitting and not reclining at the table. While DaVinci may have not had the proper seating, it wasn’t perverted. So to the people who think Christians need more education about this, maybe those who don’t understand Christianity need to read the Bible and understand that we don’t take it or what God means to us lightly. And while perverting the Last Supper may not have been France’s intention, I don’t know. I do know WE ALL one day will have to give an account for our words and actions.

We are all sinners. We ALL fall short of the glory of God (Roman’s 3:23), we ALL need a Savior and that Person would be Jesus Christ. This isn’t the first time Jesus was mocked. And none of this has taken God by surprised. He knew before the foundation of the world, this would take place. God is a gracious God. Read Genesis 6:9-22 when God wiped out all of humanity except for Noah and his family. Read Genesis 19 about Sodem and Gomorrah and see how God dealt with that situation. Read Revelation and see how God will deal with sin in the future. Matthew 12:36 “and I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak” (NLT). Romans 14:12 “Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God” (NLT).

My heart has been hurt, I am grieving. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t mad, I am and hurt. I know many of us are feeling similar feelings if not the same. But can we forgive? Can we forgive as Jesus forgives us? Ephesians 4:32. Jesus was mocked when He hung on the cross and said “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” – Luke 23:34 (NKJV). “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.” – Galatians 6:7 (NIV).

We could use this opportunity to share the Gospel and help others understand why this grieves us and God. Perhaps we could use it as an opportunity to show forgiveness. Let keep fighting the good fight, let’s not grow weary of doing good, spreading the Gospel, “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.” – Galatians 6:9 (NLT).